Food for Thoughts

Showing posts with label Attitude. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Attitude. Show all posts

Black Hole

I am currently reading "The Upside of Adversity", by Os Hilman.

Here's what I took away about what to do when you are in black hole situation?

1. Ask God if there are any sins, habits, or attitudes that He might be judging in our life
2. Trust God when we enter a black hole
3. Black hole is to refine and define us, so that we can influence others
4. Ask God for grace to endure trial, like Joseph
5. Learn to lean on God
6. Alert to new truth and new perspective
7. Live each day to the fullest. Don’t live in the past

Acceptance

Everybody desires acceptance. In seeking to be accepted, we need to accept others as well. Too often, we seek one way,ie being accepted. But often, it works both ways. Acceptance enables us and others to soar on greater heights, and rise up to greater potential.

It's something that I have learnt. It's something I have to relearn again. It's not easy, when we look inwardly...I have to admit. But hey, forget the past, and strain towards the goal that set forth right? A conscious decision...I have to say.

Facing the Giant

Everyone has their own giants to face. Sometimes, it's so overwhelming that you are not sure whether you carry on. You doubt about yourself. You doubt about God too. "Where are You, God?" " Why does this thing happen to me?"

Sometimes, the breakthrough is just few steps away. But we just can't see it. How many extra miles do we need to go further? Not sure.

Recently been feeling down and overwhelming with things. Anger, frustration, doubt and discouragement. You name it. I walked into a Salvation bookshop one day, and there, a sermon was broadcasted in the shop, just-in time for me to catch the sentence, "Our job is to trust God. That is. Nothing else. The rest is his job." How true and applicable it was to my situation. I had tried all means, and nothing can be done. I was angry and discouraged, and was thinking alternative ways to resolve the thing. But all in vain. And I have to agree that our job is to trust God. Nothing else. Not even myself.

The Lord says fear not for He is with me. Greater that He is in me than that he is in the world. If you have watched the movie, "Facing the Giant", you will know that perseverance and focus will lead to breakthrough. The focus is on God. "If we win, we praise God. If we loose, we praise God too."

Tough, but it is possible. What's your Giant? Lay it before Him. Trust Him too.

When You meant well

Sometimes, we are in a situation where our action means well, but the receiver thinks otherwise, and you wonder why cant the person see your point of view. It happens in all relationships, be it at home, at workplace, and everywhere whenever you have human interaction.

Recently been through this phase. An action which I meant well to remind someone, was mistaken as making a fuss. An action which I meant to clarify, was taken as criticism. Despite the usage of right word and right mannerism, the misunderstanding couldn't seem to be avoided. Am I offended? Yes, of course. Am I hurt? I can't deny. But I have decided to choose to forgive and overlook the offense. After all, what good will it be to hold? And if I choose not to let go and forgive, I will most properly be repeating the offended feelings to many ppl, and the feelings will still remain there. It's not natural to choose forgiveness, but it's an effort to make the decision. Choosing forgiveness doesn't mean you have lost the battle, but it is the opposite. The gain? Inner peace.

Believe

Into Your hands
I commit again, with all I have for You Lord
You hold my world in the palm of Your hand
And I am Yours forever

Jesus I believe in You
Jesus I belong to You
YOu are the reason that I live
The reason that I'll sing
With all I am

I walk with You
Wherever You go
Through tears and joy
I trust in YOu
And I believe, in all of your ways
your promises, forever

Jesus I believe in You
Jesus I belong to You
You are the reason that I live
The reason that I'll sing
with all I am.

Song for the Season

Ever felt yourself chained and bound, limited and restricted, especially when things get tougher and bleak? God reminded me of the account of Paul and Barnabas in the prison. Instead of dwelling in self-pitiness, unfairness and bitterness, they praised God in the prison. Yes, right where they were. And the prison door was opened. I felt challenged to learn and apply the same in all my situations, ie to praise Him.

So, here's the song for this season that I would like to share with all of you:

On My Lips
(c)2002 Darren Morehouse & Ross Parsley

All the chains are broken
I have been set free
Every word you've spoken
Is watching over me
So how can I stay silent
When I hear You call my name
Living in Your presence
I'll never be the same

I've been found in You
Now I'll sing out Your truth

On my lips there's a shout of praise
Now I'm gonna dance for all my days
because I've seen the wonder of Your loving ways
So much joy here in Your embrace
Makes me want to sing and celebrate
Because I've seen the wonder of amazing grace

Whom do You Believe?

It's been a while since I last blogged. Busy schedules, busy deadlines, not to mention challenges, and yes, stress. Like swimming in choppy sea, out towards the deep sea. No knowing what lies ahead. Not knowing what likes underneath either.

But through all these, I felt being challenged as to whom/what do I believe? My past experience? My talents? My colleagues? My friends? My circumstances? No. I felt God wants me to believe and trust in Him. Total trust. Despite my feelings and negative thoughts, unfavourable circumstances. Being a melancholics, I want to be in control in some ways. But, there are times, I realise, to let go is better. Be it unforgiveness. Be it pride. Be it fear. Be it shame.

Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. The world tells you, "You need to see it to believe it". But God says, "Only as you believe it will you ever see it". Yeah, sometimes we limit ourselves by looking at ourselves, but God wants us to live with faith and expectancy, not our small thinking. We don't need to figure out things/ how to solve problems, and wonder how God will bring to pass. Our job is to be a believer. If we can see the invisible, God will do the impossible. [Quote form Joel Osteen "Your Best Life Now"]

So, start to believe that you are an overcomer in Christ, because God said so. Start to believe that He who begins the good work in you will bring to completion, because He said so. Start to believe all things work together for those who love Him, because He said so. It doesn't mean less troubles/ opposition, but you know you have Him throughout. He is trustworthy and praiseworthy.

Asking Why?

When somethings happen to us, when things are not moving the way we want, our natural response is to ask "Why? Why me?" I am in the season of being positioned in a place that I know God has His purpose for me. But, at this moment, the purpose has yet to be unfold. Many of us, naturally, will be frustrated and not doing anything unless God tells us A to Z reasons behind it. But, for me, this is a season where God wants to strength my faith in Him. To obey and to trust in Him, like Abraham, without knowing the full picture. Well, to some people, by saying that they do not know the answers to things that going on in there life seems to be something shameful, but to me, that's where we learn to be humble and dependant on God. Afterall, who is God? We, or God himself?

I identify with Joseph a lot. To many, at prime time of age, being in prison is not a glamour place at all. But Joseph, in his prison season, maintained a good attitude and hold on to God's promises and served faithfully at where he's being placed. He could have chosen to question God, be bitter and grumble over his apparent "waste of time and talent" in the prison. But he chose to trust God for this perfect plan and purpose, though I am sure at that moment of time, he did not have the full picture of everything.

Today worshop spoke to me a lot. Here's the lyric that I like to share with you:-

I will bring praise, will bring praise
No weapon formed against me shall remain
I will rejoice, I will declare
God is my victory and he is here

All of my life, in every season
You are still God,
I have a reason to sing
I have a reason to worship

(~chorus & bridge of Desert Song @ 2008 Hillsong)

Dare to Dream

God wants to give us blessings and abundance life. He has great plans installed for us to discover. Many times, when He wants to pour unto us. But often, these are hindered and limited by our lack of faith. Joel Osteen, in his book, Your Best Life Now, encouraged us to expand our faith horizon, to see beyond our family background, our circumstances and dare to dream.

Matthew 9:28-29
When he had gone indoors, the blind men came to him, and he asked them, "Do you believe that I am able to do this?" "Yes, Lord," they replied. Then he touched their eyes and said, "According to your faith will it be done to you"

Do you believe that He is able to do so? If yes, then according to your faith He will do it to you...in His time. Lets pray and wait upon Him with great expectancy.

P/S...I have finished reading chapter 3 of Joel Osteen's "Your Best Life Now". Still reading.

Forgiveness **Part 1

I am currently reading John Loren & Paula Sandford and Lee Bowman's book, Choosing Forgiveness. Here's a summary of what I have read and my thoughts. Will share in parts.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Summary:
Love and respect in relationship can only be accomplished out of reverence to Christ. When we don't subject our wills to Christ, He will not rule our hearts, and He will not empower us to live with others in unity and forgiveness. We will be subject to one another, but to each other selfish control rather than in blessing.

In relationship, we can't avoid being subject to one another. Without Jesus' love in our lives, we will relate to one another in flesh than spirit. Only with the presence of Christ' redeeming grace, He can transform our relationships to blessings than harm.

In relationship, there's a tendency to counterbalance one another personality. However, tensions may arise when one of us is being pressed to lean uncomfortably towards the behaviour contrary to our temperament/ beliefs. To overcome this, we need to be sensitive enough to bring it to the cross and forgive. This is the time where we must evaluate what is happening in all the relationships and put our own ego in proper perspective. Step by step, day by day, we can take the practices of our relationships to the cross and ease the tensions through forgiveness. Through the power of Jesus Christ, our selfishness can be put to death and our wounded feelings get healed.

When our self-serving way of loving is brought to death on the cross, we radiate a warm and nurturing environment characteristic of the nature of Christ. Others then feel free to be themselves around us, and they feel free to respond to us in trust and love.


My thoughts:
God brings various people into our path. If you notice, we tend to get very agitated with certain people, or certain people with similar behaviours. Many of us, especially those who are very judgmental/critical, tend to lash out/ bad mouthing/get angry with them. We justify our anger, our attitude and our behaviour by blaming others for their misbehaviour. Our ego gets "bruised" when our advice are not taken in/ acted on, or the person did not do/ behave the way we have expected them to me. Expectation and blaming game kicks in. In actual fact, many a times, we didn't live up to their expectations as well.

I have learnt from this book that we are responsible for our own emotions, not others. Respect, acceptance, affirmation and grace. While confrontation is necessary at times, but honestly speaking, many avoid people that don't allow them to be themselves, people that always pick on you/ criticise everything that you do, but hardly praise/affirm.

The same yardstick you use on others, the same yardstick will be used on you. Strive to influence without ego. Learn and practise forgiveness

Charisma

ability to show your care = Concern
ability to reach out = Helpful
ability to make things happen = Action
ability to produce = Result
ability to lead = Influence
ability to feel & respond = Sensitive
ability to give hope = Motivation
ability to build up = Affirmation

Communication

With the modern technologies, there are many tools we use to communicate now. While snail mails and postcards are still around in the market, emails, SMS and handphone are something that most people can't leave without. The effectiveness of whichever way that you choose to communicate really depends on the audience, contents, urgency and location. And it varies from individuals to individuals. The tool and style that suits you, may not be suitable to you audience. Thing that seems to so "common sense" to you, may not be for others.

I have a client who has very busy schedule and most of the time I can't get hold of him via his office direct line. I realised later that his prefers mode of communication is email, as most of time, he is very responsive via email. So, I change my style and mode of communication with him. There was once, I have arranged a appointment for him and my candidate, but the appointment is within the next few hours, and I need his confirmation soonest. So, I chose SMS instead followed by an email. And he responded via sms due to the urgency.
I love home-cooked food. Almost every evening, I dine with my family. So, my agreement with my family is that if I won't be home for dinner, either I inform early in the morning before I leave home, or if something ad-hoc came up during the day, I will inform by 5pm. SMS is my usual mode of informing. There was once, it's almost 5pm, and something came up that I wouldn't be back for dinner, I chose to SMS. And of course, the message was not read in time, and my portion was prepared. What a waste! So, I learnt my lesson, and the next time, especially it's almost 5pm, I SMS to inform.
With the modern technologies, we have many modes to choose to communicate. While economical is ideal, it should not undermine the efficiency and effectiveness of the communication. Sometimes email and SMS may be delayed, even though on your end it indicates delivery...transmission problem. Email and SMS are convenient, but there are things that we can resolve by just one phone call away.
So, choose wisely and be flexible to change when it needs to be.
Communication is really an art and skill that requires constant learning and improvement. We can't achieve 100% no misunderstanding full proof, but I think it will help reduce and perhaps "repair" the damage that has been done before.

Faith and Believe~Quotes

Quoted frm NLRC, Faith Alive
Faith is being sure of what we hope for. Hope does not disappoint. If you are disappoited about something, turn it around. Start with a simple hope. Bring that hope to Jesus. Faith will come and you will receive.

My Daily Faith Confession: I am a child of God. God is my Father who loves me even though he knows everything about me. B'coz God is for me, I have no fear. I am not anxious b'coz He is handling everyone of my concerns. My God is a good God and I know that something good is happening to me everyday of my life.

I BELIEVE, therefore I am. I do not live by what I feel. I prosper by what I believe. I believe what the Bible says about me. I am a child of God. BLESSED, FAVOURED, PROTECTED, ANOINTED and filled with His grace which can MORE than take care of any mountain infront of me. I am a conqueror and MORE.


Live life full! Live as if you are passionately loved and securely wrapped in the arms of our Heavenly faither. Live as if He is smiling at you . Live as if God is on your team. Live without a care in this world. Deu 33:27, Num 6:25, Rom 8:31, 1Pet5:7

God's hand stretches out to those who dares to "believe". Believing makes the impossible possible and the "CAN'Ts" to "CANs". Believing releases the angels to work on our behalf. Be daring to believe God for miracles - Your Father delights to give them to You.
Rom10:10-Speak life into every situation! God's supernatural power is released when we BELIEVE with our hearts and SPEAK with our lips. God believed and spoke the world into being. This is the double barell key to crative miracles. Keep believing, keep speaking and life will spring forth around you.

Careful with Our Speech

Children are fast learner and great imitator. Basically they imitate our mannerism, the word we use and our lifestyle as well.

The other day, my 3 year old nephew, while I was watching the maid trying to change him into his pajamas, he kept insisting that I helped him to cut off the brand tag. When I refused to do so, he threw tantrum. Finally, my sister agreed to help him to cut off when they returned home later on. His face brightened up with a smile. Then, he looked at me, with his little finger pointing at me, saying, " You, no good. I don't want you." And I looked at him and said with a stern voice, "You say that again?" He then kept quiet. But his mannerism resembled one of his parents. It's the tone and word that the parent used when he refused to listen, or do as requested. That evening, he left my house, refusing to say/kiss me goodbye!

Here's my thoughts. Discipline children is important. But the choice of words and the way we discipline have to be wise. Children is great imitator. If you ever visit a play school/ kindergarden, you will be amazed by some of the children behaviour and speeches. And from there, you will be able to rough gauge of their family background. You reckon?

Gossips

Gossips can be extremely painful. We suffered from the wounds of careless words one time of another. We have felt the isolation and rejection they bring. So, why would any of us gossip?

Gossip is reckless or careless word that wound. What it lacks in nutritional value it makes up for in taste. It overdresses trivia that has power to penetrate deep into the soul. It is a negligent scattering of ungrounded accusations and misrepresenttions. It has no accountability, secretive and selective and its real agenda is always well hidden.

We become prey of jealousy when we mistakenly believe God's favour towards one person indicates His disfavour toward us. Jealousy breeds competition, which is fueled by gossips. Covetousness, desiring what God has given another, is an offspiring of jealousy. We are tempted to gossip when we perceived someone else's favour, provision or position as a deduction from God's ability to bless, protect or provide for us.

Is Gossip limited to spoken word?
Gossip is not limited to what is spoken. Often the most difficult and destructive gossip to share is what you have heard. As you listened, your own soul is defiled.


Gossip is rooted in unbelief and watered by fear. We fall prey to gossip when we are afraid to trust God to uphold us in truth. We malign others because we believe our worth is tied to theirs. To get rid yourself of the fruit of gossip, you need to ax the root that is nourishing the tree and fruit. To heal the wounds of gossip is to speak words in answer that contain wisdom and promote reconciliation. Giving our vision of story to the gossiper about how the offender hurt us would not bring healings.

To safeguard yourself from gossiper, ask yourself these questions:

1. Why are they telling me this?

2. Are they confessing their reaction to the offenses or just repeating it to influence me?

3. Have they gone to the individual who offended them?

4. Are they asking me to go with thme so restoration can take place?

5. Am I in a position to help them?

If the answers to above are unclear, then, you are not the one they should speak to, but the one who offended them.

The one who gossips to you, gossips of you.

"Without wood a fire goes out; without gossip a quarrel dies down" Prov 26:20

"Do not answer a fool according to his folly, or you will be like him yourself" Prov 26:4

"He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends." Prov 17:9

Reference: Lisa Bevere "Understanding Your True Measure"

Vaccination for Deadly Gossip Virus

by Dave Burchett

Four Hooksett, New Jersey town employees with 46 years of service between them were fired, in part for gossiping and discussing rumors of an improper relationship between the town administrator and another employee that Hooksett residents now agree were not true. The administrator complained, and after an investigation the town council fired the women, finding, "Gossip, whispering, and an unfriendly environment are causing poor morale and interfering with the efficient performance of town business." "When I was given my termination papers, I just looked at the gentlemen that were present in the room and I said, 'You've got to be kidding!'" said fired worker Sandy Piper, who insisted her comments weren't out of line. "We discussed it on a lunch break, and then it ended." The same thing happens everyday (except for the termination part) in offices all over this great land.

Gossip happens everyday in neighborhoods, car pools and in annoying public cell phone conversations that I am forced to hear. Gossip is a cottage industry in America. We have gossip magazines and television shows. Gossip columnists make careers out of spreading half-truths and rumors. The recurring theme of these humble ramblings is not to rail on what the culture is doing but to examine what the followers of Christ should be doing. And the answer is clear and it should be articulated directly like the soup guy from the Seinfeld TV series. No! No gossip for you!If the founding church fathers had added an 8th Deadly Sin I would nominate gossip. I have seen the devastating effect that gossip has in the church. You may have heard this too close to the truth joke.

Coming out of church, Mrs. Smith asked her husband, "Did you see that piercing that the Johnson's daughter is parading around with?"

"I didn't even see her," admitted Mr. Smith.

"And that dress Mrs. Davis was wearing," continued Mrs. Smith, "Really, don't tell me you think that's the proper outfit for a mother of two."

"I'm afraid I didn't notice that either," said Mr. Smith.

"Oh, for heaven's sake," snapped Mrs. Smith. "A lot of good it does you to go to church."

Gossip is a huge problem in the church and sometimes gossip is very stealthy. Satan has a slick marketing trick that he sells to Christians. We don't call gossip by it's name. We like to call gossip by euphemisms like "sharing our concerns" or "venting to a brother or sister". We gossip when we divulge unnecessary details in prayer requests as if God needs to be brought up to speed on the entire situation. We like to think we are in the clear if we know that the information is true and we are simply being "honest" and "telling it like it is". But Frank Clark correctly stated that "gossip needn't be false to be evil - there's a lot of truth that shouldn't be passed around."

The Bible is very clear about gossip. I found fourteen specific mentions of gossip in Scripture. A couple of Old Testament highlights:

"Do not spread slanderous gossip among your people." Leviticus 19:16.

They visit me as if they were my friends,but all the while they gather gossip,and when they leave, they spread it everywhere. Psalm 41:6

A troublemaker plants seeds of strife; gossip separates the best of friends. Proverbs 16:28

Paul reveals how seriously he ranks gossip when he includes the act of gossip in this not so attractive menu of sins.

Their lives became full of every kind of wickedness, sin, greed, hate, envy, murder, quarreling, deception, malicious behavior, and gossip.

Romans 1:29 Seriously, do most of us lump gossip in with hate, murder and deception? Paul does. The church at Corinth also had an ugly list of problems and gossip made the list.

For I am afraid that when I come I won't like what I find, and you won't like my response. I am afraid that I will find quarreling, jealousy, anger, selfishness, slander, gossip, arrogance, and disorderly behavior. 2 Corinthians 12:20

If Paul were to write a letter to the modern church he would surely include gossip in his list of rebukes. A follower of Jesus certainly should not spread gossip any further. Gossip is a parasite that requires a host organism to survive. Don't give gossip a place to live.Solomon wrote this in Proverbs. Fire goes out without wood,and quarrels disappear when gossip stops. Proverbs 26:20

Think of how many times you have believed something to be true only to find out the information was mostly or even totally wrong. I find it interesting that the threat of a libel or slander lawsuit will cause us to be cautious about our remarks in the public square. How naive that we think it is okay to denigrate a child of God and somehow think that there are no repercussions to that action. Are we really more concerned about the People's Court than the Kingdom's Court? Pastor Rick Warren makes a great point when he says that "The problem with Christians is that we take ourselves too seriously and we don't take God seriously enough."

God takes seriously how we communicate about others in the flock. Peter said to "Be agreeable, be sympathetic, be loving, be compassionate, be humble. That goes for all of you, no exceptions. No retaliation. No sharp-tongued sarcasm. Instead, bless-that's your job, to bless. You'll be a blessing and also get a blessing". 1 Peter 3:8-9 (MsgB) So there is an added bonus for your Godly communicationÅ a blessing at no extra charge.

Pastor Jim Cymbala of Brooklyn Tabernacle writes how his church handles the topic of gossip.

About 20 years ago, I said something impromptu to the new members lined up across the front of the church. As we received them, the Holy Spirit prompted me to add, "And now, I charge you that if you ever hear another member speak an unkind word of criticism or slander against anyone-myself, an usher, a choir member, or anyone else-that you stop that person in mid-sentence and say, 'Excuse me-who hurt you? Who ignored you? Who slighted you?
Was it Pastor Cymbala? Let's go to his office right now. He'll apologize to you, and then we'll pray together so God can restore peace to this body. But we won't let you talk critically about people who aren't present to defend themselves.'
"I'm serious about this. I want you to help resolve this kind of thing immediately. And know this: If you are ever the one doing the loose talking, we'll confront you."

To this day, every time we receive new members, I say much the same thing. That's because I know what most easily destroys churches. It's not crack cocaine, government oppression, or even lack of funds. Rather it's gossip and slander that grieves the Holy Spirit.

Powerful. And so achingly true. God is not glorified when we spread gossip and idle chatter. The test is very simple. If I am not part of the situation or a part of the solution I should not be talking about it. James is typically to the point in this brutally honest assessment.A careless or wrongly placed word out of your mouth can do that. By our speech we can ruin the world, turn harmony to chaos, throw mud on a reputation, send the whole world up in smoke and go up in smoke with it, smoke right from the pit of hell. James 3:6 (MsgB)

Vaccinate yourself with a couple of scriptural truths about gossip. An injection of biblical truth and a dose of how God views gossip can control the deadly virus. And that will make the body of Christ a whole lot healthier.