Learning Curve

by Os Hillman~From Today God is First daily devotion

I eagerly expect and hope that I will in no way be ashamed, but will have sufficient courage so that now as always Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death. - Philippians 1:20

Have you ever had expectations that did not get fulfilled? Perhaps a coworker let you down. Perhaps you were trusting God for something in your life that never materialized. Perhaps you became devastated by an unmet expectation that you felt you were entitled to. Expectations can be a difficult trap for each of us if we are not fully committed to God's purposes in our lives.

Paul wrote this verse from prison to the people of Philippi. He had an expectation that his life would bring glory to God, whether through his continued ministry or his death. His joy in living was not based on his expectations getting fulfilled, but on remaining true to the purpose for which God made him.

When we react to circumstances with bitterness and resentment as a result of unmet expectations, we are saying that we know better than God, and that God has made a mistake in not meeting our expectations. The process of resolving unmet expectations may require full disclosure to the individual who was the source of the unmet expectation, and of how the unmet expectation made you feel. This is not to make the person feel obligated to meet the expectation, but simply to share your feelings about it. If God was the source, then it is important to share this with the Lord. However, once we have done this we must let go of the situation and allow God to work in our hearts the grace that is needed to walk in freedom from the pain of the unmet expectation. If we do not do this, we will allow the seed of bitterness and resentment to enter in. This seed of bitterness will create leanness in our soul and eventually will spread to others.

Ask yourself today if you have any unmet expectations. How have you responded to them? Have you processed this with the Lord and others who may be involved? These are the steps to freedom from unmet expectations.

Posted in: Articles on Monday, July 21, 2008 at at 1:54 PM 0 comments

I am currently reading John Loren & Paula Sandford and Lee Bowman's book, Choosing Forgiveness. Here's a summary of what I have read and my thoughts. Will share in parts.

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Summary:
Love and respect in relationship can only be accomplished out of reverence to Christ. When we don't subject our wills to Christ, He will not rule our hearts, and He will not empower us to live with others in unity and forgiveness. We will be subject to one another, but to each other selfish control rather than in blessing.

In relationship, we can't avoid being subject to one another. Without Jesus' love in our lives, we will relate to one another in flesh than spirit. Only with the presence of Christ' redeeming grace, He can transform our relationships to blessings than harm.

In relationship, there's a tendency to counterbalance one another personality. However, tensions may arise when one of us is being pressed to lean uncomfortably towards the behaviour contrary to our temperament/ beliefs. To overcome this, we need to be sensitive enough to bring it to the cross and forgive. This is the time where we must evaluate what is happening in all the relationships and put our own ego in proper perspective. Step by step, day by day, we can take the practices of our relationships to the cross and ease the tensions through forgiveness. Through the power of Jesus Christ, our selfishness can be put to death and our wounded feelings get healed.

When our self-serving way of loving is brought to death on the cross, we radiate a warm and nurturing environment characteristic of the nature of Christ. Others then feel free to be themselves around us, and they feel free to respond to us in trust and love.


My thoughts:
God brings various people into our path. If you notice, we tend to get very agitated with certain people, or certain people with similar behaviours. Many of us, especially those who are very judgmental/critical, tend to lash out/ bad mouthing/get angry with them. We justify our anger, our attitude and our behaviour by blaming others for their misbehaviour. Our ego gets "bruised" when our advice are not taken in/ acted on, or the person did not do/ behave the way we have expected them to me. Expectation and blaming game kicks in. In actual fact, many a times, we didn't live up to their expectations as well.

I have learnt from this book that we are responsible for our own emotions, not others. Respect, acceptance, affirmation and grace. While confrontation is necessary at times, but honestly speaking, many avoid people that don't allow them to be themselves, people that always pick on you/ criticise everything that you do, but hardly praise/affirm.

The same yardstick you use on others, the same yardstick will be used on you. Strive to influence without ego. Learn and practise forgiveness

Posted in: Attitude on Sunday, July 20, 2008 at at 10:32 PM 0 comments

As a headhunter, and someone who is passionate to coach & develop people, it's natural that I feel a sense of fulfillment and joy when I land someone with a dreamed job, be it a career change, or working environment, or pay increment. A dream "releaser"...I suppose. A rewarding feeling that really beyond description

Tales of Two

~ A candidate who is very much underpaid at the moment, possesses great attitude and good communication skill. A client looking for a financial background person who wants to be a software product specialist, of which, he doesn't has the software experience, but his financial background & communication skill helps. Yesterday was the interview. It went well and a second interview was scheduled next week. The candidate kept thanking me for helping him and giving him an opportunity. It will be a career change for him.

~ Went with a friend to a music shop to look to scout for piano. She has wanted to teach music to earn side income, but so far, where she turned to has been discouragement. Many institutes require a music teacher must have completed grade 8 as a pre-requisite. Divine appointment. This particular music school that we went to believes in caliber, creativity and attitude more than the paper. Felt led to nudge my friend to ask the gentleman, who so happened to be one of the business partners, on their hiring requirements. The gentleman has been very patiently showing us various piano models. After all the discussion and conversation, my friend felt good about it...I guess she must be dreaming about it..being a part-time music teacher. Didn't do much for her, guess being there, supportive and being " Si Lai" to ask the right question that connect her to the opportunity helps...:)

Dare to dream. Dare to release others to pursue their dreams

Posted in: My Story on Saturday, July 12, 2008 at at 9:46 AM 0 comments

Standing at the river bank
Staring at the rapid flow
Hesitant to dive in
Couldn't resist to deep in, at last

Flow with the river
Enjoy the chasm; the scenery
Into the open sea as we flow
Overwhelming vastness makes us pause



Like the Lord to Joshua
Be strong and courageous
Do not be terrified nor discouraged
The Lord will be with us wherever we go

Blessed is the man
walk not in counsel of wicked
nor stand in the way of sinners
nor sit in the seat of mockers

His delight is in the law of the Lord
The law he meditates day and night
Like a tree planted by streams of water
yielding fruits in season
And the leaf doesn't wither
Whatever he does prospers

Posted in: About Life on Thursday, July 10, 2008 at at 10:08 PM 0 comments

Attended a talk about interpersonal skill/ relationship by Touch Life organisation.
www.touchlife.org
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The bible is all about relationship in all aspects. Relationship with God, with yourself and with others.

Why is it important?
* To be successful, you need to have good interpersonal skill and build good relationship with others. ~Frank Roosevelt

* A manager or a leader, has not value-adding if he/she can't mobilise people, even though he/she is smart/ highly intellectual. There's a saying that if you are zero EQ, the game is over.

Have you noticed why some people are very much welcome, or accepted by others, whereas some are not? Most likely, the former is someone who give affirmation, love, respect and acceptance to others.

God is always proactive in relationship. You can see that in the bible, when Adam & Eve sinned, and Cain murdered his brother, God was the one made the initiative to lookout for them. In Mark 12:30, "Love your God with all your heart, soul & mind. Love others as yourself." Lets decipher the sequence: 1st Love God, 2nd Love yourself, 3rd Love others. So, love yourself comes before loving others. Love yourself is to affirm, respect and accept yourself. Because, God has done so to us.

Your relationship with yourself is important as it affects your relationship with others:

* Someone who wants to cover their weakness likes to correct others
* Those who like to judge other are often lack of self affirmation

So, love your God with all your heart, soul & mind. Love others as yourself. So, strive to build good relationship and work on the interpersonal skill. It will carry you far...you will be amazed at the outpour of willingness & helps in all your circumstances. When you shout at the valley, the valley resonates your voice, and nothing else. So it is when it comes to relationship.

Posted in: About Life on Sunday, July 6, 2008 at at 8:19 AM 0 comments

by Rick Warren

When will you ever learn that “believing” is useless without doing what God wants you to? Faith that does not result in good deeds is not real faith. James 2:20 (LB)

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Is faith simply a frame of mind? A passive attribute of a Christian waiting to see what God has in store for you: a promotion, cancer, depression, betrayal, blessing, wealth, and injustice . . . some see it that way. They might say, “I’ll just wait to see what God is going to do for me and go with the flow.” That’s crazy talk.

Faith is active. It’s not passive. It’s a commitment. Look at your lifestyle and see what kind of actions follow as a result of it. If you’ve got the real stuff, faith can be demonstrated.

When you were baptized you made a statement to God and the people around you. You said, “I’m in!” But it doesn’t stop at baptism – not by a long shot! What else do you do? You start following the pattern of Jesus. Faith is proven by how we live. Don’t misinterpret this. What you do – your walking around, everyday life – doesn’t get you into heaven. It doesn’t make you saved. It doesn’t mean you’re a Christian; it shows you are a Christian.

The next steps:

· Celebrate the lavish gift of grace. You were saved because Jesus is crazy about you and wants you to be with him in heaven. Revel in it!

· Show your faith. Wedding rings don’t make you married, but they say “Yes” in a visible way. In the same way, baptism isn’t the thing that will get you into heaven but it’s an act of obedience. (Jesus commanded us to baptize and be baptized.)

· Share your faith with the people around you. If you are excited about what God has done in your life, then why not share it? There are lots of ways to do that. Get plugged into serving God. There are literally millions of possibilities. Point people to Jesus and love them like Jesus did. It’ll be something you will relish for eternity.

Posted in: Articles on Friday, July 4, 2008 at at 10:01 AM 0 comments

Posted in: My Story on Tuesday, July 1, 2008 at at 10:08 PM 0 comments